I am way to pretty for this…

23 Jun

Perhaps Nabila had raised my standards for what a teacher should be- young, attractive, funny, charismatic, patient, etc. But I was not feeling my new teacher – at all. After giving me a 100 question test, to access my abilities she begin copying random stuff that I already knew from a book and not really going over it, I barely spoke the whole class. Plus she was sick and kept spitting out the window- not at all attractive. What I need to work on is speaking Spanish and that was not happening. After inquiring about the possibility of shortening the hours of my classes, I was informed that it was possible but I would not get any money back. Then my thinking changed to perhaps I will just leave a day early. I choose the school mainly because of the activities- learning to make soap, typical food cook, jewelry making and volunteering. After spending the rest of my Monday in ridiculous heat, searching for internet- my mind was made up I was leaving on Tuesday. I could learn to make soap on youtube. I was not learning anything and more importantly I was not happy.

My life, my happiness is in my hands. I understand that the fact that I DON’T DO ANYTHING I DON’T WANT TO, makes me privilege. Any job I have had, I had the option of quitting the moment I wanted to, without worrying how the rent would be paid or how I would eat. I have a choice to spend years studying a subject I love or entering the work force.  I have a choice whether my shower would be cold or hot in the morning.  Going to Guatemala and not a more luxurious destination was my choice. My life is filled with a million choices and rarely is money a factor in my decision making process. This makes me very blessed and I acknowledge how very blessed I am. I think it is my responsibility to choose my happiness when so many people do not have a choice.  So I left San Jose, which happens to be a beautiful town. I do not have the time or the energy to do anything my heart is not into. A little bit of money is a small price to pay to make me happy…

When I told the director I was leaving she asked me if I wanted to change teachers but my mind was made. It was a bit awkward in the class, after telling the teacher I rather lose money then continue my lessons with her. There was another student on Tuesday and her teacher did not seem much better. The girls seem cool- I sent her info on Casa Jackson and my Spanish school in Coban (since that was her next stop and I want to share Nabila with the world). I felt bad leaving the family; the grandmother asked me if I wanted to change families. I assured her it was not her, the food was REALLY good, her grandson was adorable (he had the flyest haircut and we painted the night before) and her daughter was also really nice.

I boarded a chicken bus (I am real bold now traveling with the locals alone) and headed to Flores. From here I will see the ruins at Tikal. Back to the land of private rooms/baths and eating alone. I promise I will practice my Spanish with my Spanish book everyday…

Oh and a flying cockroach about as big as Texas in my room on Monday night had very little to do with my decision.

~Just Tab.


Posted by on June 23, 2010 in Uncategorized


2 responses to “I am way to pretty for this…

  1. Miki

    June 23, 2010 at 2:35 am

    “I think it is my responsibility to choose my happiness when so many people do not have a choice. ”

    Quote of the day.

  2. BlackinCairo

    June 24, 2010 at 10:10 am

    its good that you are aware of your privilege. So many ppl who go abroad are not and they find themselves confused and repulsed by the way other people live. I hope you find a better Spanish class and learn espagnol!


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