Monthly Archives: March 2011

Fly- What I came here for…

I was planning to write a whole blog lamenting on my place (or lack of place) in academia. How I refuse to compromise who I am to fit in with the white intellectual elites. How my life will actually affect change, rather than writing countless theoretical papers. How I plan to live (Because everybody dies but not everybody lives). How the power in me is greater than any external forces that seeks to challenge me. How do I answer the “what am I doing here” question- when because of my race, class, gender, age, etc. I am constantly reminded that I don’t belong in the places that I occupy? Today, after not having the best meeting with the chair of my department- the question “What did I come here for” resounded over and over in my head. My answer came from an unlikely source…Nicki Minaj. I have some strong feelings on Nicki, her image and persona. Let it be known I am not a Nicki fan…but I did find the lyrics to one of her songs incredibly inspiring- “Fly”.

Particularly the chorus…

“I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise
To fly”

and her last verse….

“Everybody wanna try to box me in
Suffocating everytime it locks me in
Paint they own pictures than they crop me in
But I will remain where the top begins
Cause I am not a word, I am not a line
I am not a girl that can every be defined
I am not fly, I am levitation
I represent an entire generation
I hear the criticism loud and clear
That is how I know that the time is near
So we become alive in a time of fear
And I aint got no muthaf-cking time to spare
Cry my eyes out for days upon days
Such a heavy burden placed upon me
But when you go hard your nay’s become yay’s
Yankee Stadium with Jay’s and Kanye’s”


I encourage you to listen to the song if you are in need of a bit of inspiration.

In everything I do, in all the spaces I occupy- I did not come to be anyone’s token or to fail. I came from one reason- I came to win. During this journey to winning- I will have to fight, in order to conquer, to thrive, to survive, to prosper and to rise but know this I will win. The number one reason I will win is because I refuse to let anyone define me or what success/happiness/whatever should look for me.



So my Tabians 🙂 what did you come here for?


~Just Tab


Posted by on March 31, 2011 in Academia, Learning bout Tab!, music, Rants


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Can’t forget about Haiti…

I do know that it has been 2 months since I left Haiti. My apologies, life gets hectic sometimes.  So where did we leave off? I was starting to like the white people. I actually ended up really liking them and more so respecting them. Especially Andy, the man who started European Disaster Volunteers.  He started EDV after surviving the Tsunami disaster in Asia. His girlfriend at the time was not as lucky and died in the tsunami. After he recovered from his injuries he return to Thailand to help rebuild. He has since worked in Chile after the earthquake in disaster relief. The man is sincere and genuine. But enough of him…here are some pictures…

There a bit disjointed…and the music selection may seem a bit random. The point is to show you aspects of my trip without making you feel like you were on the journey with me. See the people I met without feeling like you are seeing a save the children commercial. There are no titles…no narrative. So make up your own story or meanings about the pictures. The ethics of travel can be pretty problematic. I can critique white people going to save Haiti…but there is still a critique that I can do on myself from my privilege well-educated subject position. The fact that I am Black and in my head I am not going to save anybody, does not resolve me of the issues and ethical dilemmas that hegemony marks on my “American” body on foreign soil.


European Disaster Volunteers is a pretty great organization one that I would recommend to those interested in traveling or donating to a NGO in Haiti. Yes, I do still keep up with some of the people I met in Haiti…shout out to G-Chat. 🙂 But now that I finally uploaded the Haiti pictures…perhaps I will be updating more frequently.

Much love…

~Just Tab

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Posted by on March 27, 2011 in Haiti, my friends, Them Black people, Travel


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